CONTAGIOUS CONVERSATIONS

I arrive first and fold into the chair as if a bodyguard protecting me from something of which I’m not quite aware. Tentative at first, the whole of me sits in upright angles but soon I’m leaning all the way in, and warm conversation fills the air, like fresh grounds of the darkest blend, generous, luscious, permeating.

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I am mindful of my words. Even the softest of those spoken carry the spirit of their intention, no matter how kind, no matter how stern. If I am sharing difficult news, no quiet whisper can suppress the angst that hovers in the atmosphere, settling into the hearts of innocent bystanders who haven’t lived the story behind the message in my here and now.

I BELIEVE OUR WORDS, HARSH OR GENTLE, IMBED THEMSELVES INTO THE WALLS OF OUR SANCTUARIES, LINGERING THERE LONG AFTER, FORMING AND INFORMING ALL THE CONVERSATIONS AHEAD.

Last week, attached to no explanation, I received the following text from Mindy:
Contagious Conversations

What was meant as a simple prompt of sorts from an intimate friend has become my recent obsession…my conviction, my quest—

AM I CONTAGIOUS WITH MY CONVERSATIONS? IF SO, WHAT MESSAGE AM I HOPING WILL SPREAD?

It’s not that people are listening to, as much as feeling what we say. And it’s not only our mouths that do the talking. What does our smile, our cadence, our posture convey?

I could fill a silent room with a loud narrative of love simply by standing nearer to you.
I could reassure you simply by taking your hand.

The conversations we long for are spoken in primal languages more beautiful than words—
The willingness to sit with a friend whose grief surpasses definition.
The smile that shifts the energy of a crowded room.
The deep breath that makes the space needed to connect heart with head.
The quiet that overrides the temptation to fill the void, allowing the deeper thought to settle in.

WHAT IS CONTAGIOUS, THEN, IS NOT ALWAYS WHAT WE SAY BUT HOW.

I glance across the room and see the lovers gazing into one another’s eyes.
I see the new mother gently kissing her baby’s forehead.
I watch the children running hand-in-hand through the park.

We long for this, chase after this contagious conversation when words are unnecessary to sense exactly what is transpiring.

How then shall we behave to change a little portion of our world, in the cafe, on the playground, in our home?
What we pour out is not only in the moment but residual, giving far longer, and more far-reaching, than we can ever know.
The secret to everything is this— being contagious requires first seeing life from the heart’s point of view and then responding with a love that infects everything you do.

NOTES:

“I’ll have what she’s having.” Perhaps the most famous contagious conversation ever scripted.

Sometimes I catch myself watching someone else and think, “I want that” without understanding what “that” really is at all.

What I do know is that our enthusiasm for our own lives is contagious. It inspires those around us to examine the details of their world and make the necessary shift.

At least I hope that’s true. So many of us devote headspace to being envious rather than examining what is working for someone else and allowing it to inspire us to make the necessary shift.

No matter what we observe in others, WE have the power within US to infuse our enthusiasm for life into literally everyone we encounter. 

What does a Contagious Conversation sound like?

~Asking someone what they think instead of always needing to be “the one.”

~Telling someone, “I believe in you,” when they are doubting themselves.

~Demonstrating that you are open to learning something from the other person instead of feeling like you always need to be right.

~Inviting collaboration on how to fix a relationship that isn’t quite right…”How can we fix this?”

~Sharing from your heart about something that has been on your mind...the body. mind. spirit. connection is essential. 

It turns out, building up and edifying another, instilling confidence and a sense of self-worth and value is the most contagious thing of all.

What contagious conversations are you having that have the potential to change everything about your life...and the life of someone else? 

Don't yield to fear or be troubled in your hearts—instead, be contagious (John 14:27)! For in this unbelieving world you will experience trouble and sorrows, but you must be contagious, for I have conquered the world. (John 16:33)

IMAGE NOTES: This extraordinary woman is Selah...yes, named after the word from scripture that literally means, "to pause." She knows better than most what it means to be willing [and able] to remain silent so others can set their thoughts free into the world.